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Wed,11-Dec-2024

Park your Wicked Camper in sexy little towns like: Lorne, Apollo Bay, Torquay, Anglesea and Port Campbell and chill out, swim, hike, drink, eat, puke...whatever you like!

If you're starting out in Melbourne, pickup your Wicked Camper and head south towards Geelong baby! If it's the right time of year, you'll drive past endless fields of rapeseed plantations (what the fuck is with that name??!!). You can't miss them as they're bright yellow and perfect for a sneaky flowery-hippy pic! If you need supplies, head into Geelong and hit the local Coles or Woolworths to save some coin.

Geelong is Victoria's 2nd biggest city. I think - i might just be making that up. Anyway, there's a tonne of old churches and bogans to look at, but if you're on a tight schedule then keep heading south and take the Torquay exit to check out Bells Beach & Torquay. A surfing mecca, know around the world, Bells Beach consists of 3 distinct waves - Jan Juc, Rincon and Winki-Pop and when the swells up, it's an amazing sight to behold! The water in Winter is pretty fresh, around 13 degrees, and around 17-19 in Summer, so you'll want a wetsuit if you're thinking of hiring a surfboard! TIP: Across the road from Bells Surfing Reserve is a big sprawl of grass with a tonne of kangaroos molesting each other in the afternoon sun!

Next turnoff is Point Addis - a great place to look out over the entire surf coast! Some bastard drove over my surfboard in this car park and smooshed it, but it was an accident and he was clearly a bit braindead from decades of saltwater and miscellaneous drug-use, so i decided to let it go.

That night I got really hammered and lit it on fire as a sacrifice to the penguin-god, 'Mojimba'. Bullshit aside however, the next town, Anglesea, has plenty more surf beaches, bakeries & fish shops.

Keep heading towards Lorne and if it's getting late, find a place to park your campervan for the night. In town are a bunch of shops and bars, all looking over the spectacular main beach and little skate bowl! Get drunk or don't, and chill for the night in your campervan before launching into tomorrow!

After Lorne you really get onto the Great Ocean Road, as the road hugs the beach with incredible views, particularly in the afternoon as the sea-mist blows onto the land. Make sure you stop in at the Kennett River Caravan Park to see all the wild koalas in the trees! It's amazing to think you can camp in your Wicked Camper with Koalas just above your heads!

After Kennett River and the endless bends and twists of the road, your Wicked Camper will bring you to Apollo Bay. Apollo Bay is a sleepy little coastal town, but very pretty nonetheless. Continuing along the Great Ocean Road, you'll want to head towards Cape Otway and the Lighthouse. There are fucking heaps of koalas around these parts so watch the trees above! The lighthouse in Cape Otway was home to the kids show 'Round the Twist' - an ABC classic!

At this point the road takes a detour inland for around 40km until you reach Port Campbell and the 12 Apostles! I would highly recommend taking a helicopter tour over the 12 Apostles and the coast, as it gives you an insane view of these limestone pillars and an idea of how the wind and ocean has scuplted them over millions of years!

The 12 Apostles are quite impressive. Take the time to walk down to the beach and soak in the sheer scale of the limestone cliffs! After this are more little wonders like the London Arch and the Lord Ard Gorge, so be sure to have the camera ready.

Once you've seen enough of Port Campbell and its surrounds, keep heading west towards Adelaide baby! Next up are seaside towns like Warnambool, Portland and Port Fairy. Port Fairy is particularly pretty, with a cute little harbour and main street. It's a great place to stop for lunch and chill in the back of your Wicked Campervan.

As you near the South Australian border you'll notice that your chances of being savagely murdered increase rather substantially. I'm just joking, South Australians are weird but they're cool. Mount Gambier will be your first stop in South Australia. Mount Gambier is a small, country town with plenty of charm and a massive dormant volcano that now holds the towns water. It's quite impressive and worth a look, as the water often takes on a fluroescent blue glow!

Head back towards the coast and you'll discover the sparse seaside towns of Kingston and Coorong. A koala ran out in front of us in Kingston, so watch out for the wildlife while driving in these parts! Coorong was the film location for the Australian Classic 'Storm Boy' - it's a deserted part of the coast overlooking the Sir Richard Peninsula. It feels a little eerie and smells a little fishy, but damn it's pretty.

Heading towards Adelaide, you can either jump on the freeway and go through Murray Bridge and Talem Bend, no doubt home to 100's of serial killers. Or you can go through to Victor Harbour and cut north. When you get to Adelaide, drop your campervan off and scout around the town.

It's a great trip, best seen over 5-6 days and your best way to see it is to hire a Wicked Campervan baby!